Step 1: Be mindful of the times when you’re critical of yourself, saying “I’m always…[late/chickening out/ screwing up/causing problems/etc]
The next time you hear your inner critic saying “I’m always…” stop and take a breath.
Step 2: Challenge those “I’m always…” thoughts
Then ask yourself, is this really true?
So if you’re saying “I’m always late” or “I’m always chickening out” – find an example in your life when you did show up on time or when you did choose courage over comfort.
Step 3: Reframe it as a thing of the past
If you can’t find an example to prove your “I’m always…xyz” thought wrong, then you can still lessen its impact by saying to yourself “In the past, I’ve done xyz, but now I can do abc.”
For example, you could say “In the past, I’ve let fear hold me back, but now I can take action towards my dreams even though I’m afraid.”
Step 4: Take action to prove yourself wrong
Creating and maintaining momentum is a key component of success, and we can cultivate this state of mind through a deliberate habit of taking action. Show up, take a step forward, keep moving and don’t stop no matter what.
You’re training your brain that it’s safe to take steps into the unknown. And reminding yourself that it’s ok to act without knowing all the answers.
Write down one action that you can take this week, no matter how small, towards your vision of success. Whatever it is, ask a friend or coach to hold you accountable and then create the time and space to make it happen.\
Step 5: Expect obstacles and practice self-compassion
Obstacles are a part of any journey, so rather than be afraid of them, you can expect them and see them as a sign that you’re trying to achieve something BIG.
When you do experience setbacks, you can bounce back more quickly by creating an internal safety net.
Practicing self-compassion is the best way to prove to yourself that you have your own back and it’s ok to take risks, sometimes fall short and “fail” along the way.
The important thing is to learn from mistakes and keep moving. You need to be able to bounce back.
Take a short self-compassion break any time you feel discouraged. You can try listening to my Self-Compassion Meditation (www.lisaabramson.com/ self-compassion-meditation) or saying the following words to yourself until you feel supported and comforted.
“This is tough, I’m having a hard time right now.
Other people feel this way too.
May I be kind to myself in this moment and give myself the compassion I need.”
Step 6: Enjoy the afterglow of your mindset reset
The more you practice these steps, the more confident you will begin to feel, even as you step into the unknown.
And over time, additional pockets of joy, contentment and peace will appear as you up open to new possibilities and achieve success your way.